Age of Doorknob Supremacy

Look out, inferior humans.

In today's shocking news, locked doorknobs have surpassed humans in capability of keeping a door shut. It can hold a door shut for far longer than a regular human could ever be expected to, against a far greater pushing/pulling force than an average human being. Welcome to the Age of Doorknob Supremacy. To think people used to make fun of doorknobs, calling others "dumb as a doorknob." Hah, WHO IS THE DUMB ONE _NOW_, HUHN?? It keeps a door closed BETTER THAN YOU DO!